i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
