yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
