There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
