quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize