He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
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