Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize