therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Life is so much better after having sex.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
