BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
