And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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