Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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