I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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