yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize