Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Randomize
