I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
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her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
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I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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