I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize