i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just cut my nipple shaving
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
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