I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
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