I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
