He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
so let's talk penis.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
