i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
