tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
