why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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