Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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