I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
