Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
