i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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