you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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