have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
