Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Randomize
