i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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