k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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