He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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