Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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