I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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