maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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