he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize