Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just pee around me
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
