Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
