everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Randomize