so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
do nipples grow back?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize