I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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