if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize
