I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize