and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
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You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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