are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Why are your pants in the freezer?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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