I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
