You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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