let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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