you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
His nipple licking is glorious
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