I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
