I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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