boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
